Sunday, 25 November 2012

I'm Lucas, how do you do?

So, about time for introductions I suppose!

I'm Lucas.  I grew up in Sussex, and moved to Bristol to go to university ~ literally did not know a single person here, and that was pretty scary.  It also felt like freedom, and a perfect opportunity to start over ~ new city, new people, new me.  You've heard 'fake it til you make it'?  Well, that was me.  I pretended I was confident, and knew what was going on, and over time, it kind of worked!  I was hugely insecure though, and had real problems with my self~esteem, or more accurately, the lack of it.  Which is why I put so much energy into pushing away anyone who seemed even slightly interested in being anything more than friends.  

But one guy persisted.  Every time I hung up on him, he rang back.  Even though I told him to leave me alone, I'd find him waiting outside after a lecture.  Okay, putting it like that makes him sound like a stalker!  Anyway, he somehow managed to convince me it was worth a try, and it turns out he was right.

We moved in together, and I fell pregnant.  I had pretty bad morning sickness, which unfortunately coincided with my finals, so I had to keep leaving the exam room to throw up ~ not a lot of fun.  But this was another new start ~ a new beginning for both of us.

But this baby did not like keeping to a schedule, and although I was due to give birth on September 4th, I was still waddling around very bored with the whole thing when I watched a plane flying into a building on September 11th.  Morbid fascination I guess ~ I kept watching.  Part of me wondered if it was like War of the Worlds ~ you know, the radio broadcast that everyone thought was real?  It seemed too out of the blue to be true, but of course it was.  

Baby boy made an appearance on the 24th, and that was when the fun really began.

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