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Sunday, 15 September 2013

names - the final post!



Smiler opted to keep his as is, and seems quite keen on James ~ just as well!

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Noah is keeping his first name, but dropping his middle name altogether ~ I think in solidarity with Mr Manley, who is choosing to remain middle~name~less.  I know.  No imagination.

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Apart from Petal.  She's chosen to change her middle name.  To Petal.


Not sure how much I've gone into it before, but Mr Manley, Smile, Noah and Petal are not their actual names.  Mine is ~ I am Lucas.  But I was the one choosing to identify myself, I had made that decision, but as they haven't, I gave them each a  pseudonym, an alias, a nom de plume.  Not nicknames that we use either, since I felt that defeated the point somewhat!  But now, Petal wants to be called Petal.  Keeping her first name, Petal as a middle name, and James on the end.

I even asked Mr Manley if he'd ever heard me use it in reference to her by accident, in case my cognitive impairment (new label ~ will explain another time.  Or perhaps suffice to say I chose it over 'mentally challenged' ~ wouldn't you?!), but he was pretty sure I hadn't and (rather tellingly I thought) wasn't aware that I hadn't just named everyone as their actual names.

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So that's it, all done now - we had a mammoth signing session, as the deed polls for the children had to be signed twice each by Mr Manley and I, and of course we also needed to do our own.  There is something very surreal about practicing your signature as an adult! 

Since any time the kids have to prove their identity when they're older - opening a bank account; applying for a driving licence; filling in a CRB - they'll need to show the deed poll as well as their birth certificates, we have ten each.  I know it sounds like overkill but unfortunately companies and organisations are not always as good at looking after them and returning them safely as one might wish . . .

We roped in a couple of friends to sign as witnesses, and it's interesting to me that we printed the forms for free, didn't pay a solicitor or anyone else 'official' to witness the signatures, and we've had no problems with them being accepted everywhere - including the bank and the DVLA.  So so many sites which do the paperwork for you and charge you up to £50 for the privilege - really shocking that they can charge so much.  I think the concern is that the free versions must be somehow inferior, less proper, less legitimate, and of course none of us want to be in a position when we need to prove ID (perhaps for passports, or for some financial reason), and for what we have not to 'count'!

Have you ever given any thought to changing your name?  Or do you know a child who has refused to answer to their name and instead insisted their name is something completely different, something they've chosen themselves?

To read more about the name debate in our house, check out what's in a name? and changing names to.

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